To continue my support of “No Kings” on a daily basis, I commit to no longer reading any books by Stephen King, nor the U.S. Constitution, which was signed by Rufus King. I pledge to no longer read any speeches or books by Martin Luther King Jr.
I also pledge to no longer listen to recordings of B. B. King, Albert King, Freddie King, Ben E. King, nor Carole King.
I will no longer watch reruns of Larry King nor recorded tennis matches with Billie Jean King, and I will cut my hair so that I no longer look like Don King.
And to keep Melania in her place, I will no longer read any Ellery Queen mysteries, listen to Queen Latifah, nor the band Queen.
I recommend that you do the same so you can feel as virtuous as I do until the Orange King is gone.
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